In this skill each individual commits to the other their willingness to act on the chosen solution. The action must be specific and spoken out loud to the other.
Often couples in trouble have lost faith in each other, in that the trust level is low. It becomes difficult to believe that the other will actually change. Trust builds when a person says what they will do, and then does it. Faithfully keeping your word, over time, helps trust to build.
I commit to Beth that I will do my part to activate the solution. She agrees to do her part, and then we go into the week. I suggest that there be no questioning of each other “Are you really going to do this?”. Instead, begin to build trust by allowing the other to keep his or her word. We will address follow through in tomorrow’s post.
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